Links for Lunch || But first, coffee

Morning views

An N.Y.U. Study Gone Wrong, and a Top Researcher Dismissed
Every once in a while, researchers can have the best intentions with clinical trials, but if the care and safety of the patient as a human being is not the top priority, the perception of the research and medical field takes a hit with the community. I find that to be an important factor in entering the medical profession: in order to be given permission to care for patients, you need to gain the respect of the community. Studies like these create distrust between medical professionals and the public, and ultimately causing set backs in medical innovation and research.

Researchers Uncover Long-Lost Tunnel Used By Jews To Escape Extermination Pits
In my Behavioral Sciences class, my professor wisely stated perseverance is born when an obstacle exists. This story truly shows human perseverance in times of turmoil. Although this is an example in the past, it is unfortunate that it is still happening today in other parts of the world.

The last few doctors still in Aleppo sent a letter to Obama pleading for help
Brave souls, brave doctors. Reading the letter made me cry, to have such dedication in such turmoil. How can we help them out?

Ted Talk - A doctor's touch
Dr. Verghese talks about Sherlock Holmes in the first few monites of his talk - he got me hooked from the beginning. The entire video is highly recommended for anyone interested in getting into the medical field in the near future!

‘America’s other drug problem’: Giving the elderly too many prescriptions 
Again, for anyone interested in entering the medical field this is a MUST READ! The sad reality of medicine and the elderly.

Olympians in Hijab and Bikini
And now, something completely unrelated to science. The juxtaposition is beautiful, this needs to happen more often.

Pin to Present || Roasted Chickpeas

Living on an island means that everything, including food is expensive unless you know what to get and you've got some skills in the kitchen (or at least try in my case). One of the things that I'm having trouble finding is good snacks to eat between meals that are healthy and don't break my piggy bank. My roommate started buying chickpeas in cans and using them in her salads, and I decided I should start finding recipes that will make these bad boys taste amazing.

Enter roasted chickpeas...

These little guys taste so good!! They're super easy to put together - drain, add oil and spices and pop in oven. Shake a few times. Done! I love that I can mix the spices I want and I can do a giant batch during my meal preps. Then, I pack them up in ziplock bags and bring them to school throghout the week. So all in all, definitely a successful recipe!

I'm going to try to do the same thing with raw peanuts and see how it goes! Wish me luck :)

Check out Kim's post for ingredients and recipe!

Hello Summer!

Similar dress || Jean Jacket

 

I've basically decided to stop wearing pants for the next year. I've got so many dresses, skirts, and workout pants that I find jeans to be way too restricting. The freedom and easiness that comes with picking an outfit and walking around in dresses has made me a convert. Especially in med school where every minute is spent learning, memorizing, studying and reviewing, any time shaved off getting ready is time to improve myself.

What are your favorite go-tos?

Links for Lunch || A cup of positivitea

Cutest little Tea Cozies in a Tea shop in London, England

When engineering and medicine collide 
This is so freaking cool, and hopefully it works. It's not as invasive as deep brain stimulation so for those that are afraid of brain surgery, it'd be a great temporary fix. 

When doctors need sleep 
Sometimes you just need a surface... any surface to sleep on. And doctors can't be criticized for where they choose to sleep when they live at the hospital.

Deserted Doctor's Mansion in Germany
There's something about looking at the past, untouched, that is both sad and beautiful at the same time. Imagining someone had to leave everything behind without looking back is unfathomable, and how often can we see the aftermath of the deserted?

The Perils of being manly in medicine 
I've read a lot of articles about women in medicine, so this was an interesting article about men in medicine. 

The Go to the ER mentality of American Medicine
As an EMT/medic, I have seen the abuse of the ER way too often. I'm glad I'm not the only one who sees this and this article does a great job of explaining the issues that drains the hospital's resources and money. There needs to be a fix, and it needs to happen soon!

And finally, just for fun: Dancing Hair Cells

I need you in my closet | Getting ready for Grenada

Wow, so medical school took over my life. I know I've said that in the last few posts, that's all I've been saying I've been too busy to blog. But now I'm on vacation so I have no excuses! I've taken the break I need to start fresh just in time for school to start again. Unlike other schools, mine has included a 3rd term in the summer so I'm going back at the end of June. This time I'm off to Grenada, and I'm both excited and scared. Excited because I can't wait to go back, and scared because it's a new place and I have to get my bearings and get used to a new environment quickly because second year is no joke.  I'm create another post soon on how my first year of medical school went, I've really enjoyed Fran's and Mary Ella's updates and I'd really like to put one together.

In the meantime, here are a few items I've had my eyes on for my stay:

This crochet top || This cocoon dress

 That romper || This flirty dress

Bonus:

 This travel wallet

Hurt.

One year ago, I hurt so much. It was like someone had gone in and ripped a piece of my heart out and then decided to put it back and leave it in my chest to cause more hurt. I couldn’t eat for a while. The days after, there were moments. Waves hitting me hard, then flowing away and leaving me numb. My roommates were my support system for a good while, and working helped take my mind off of it along with my heart and guts. And I could forget for a few moments.

I’ve healed so much since this day one year ago. I’ve been able to put my heart back together, but I still hurt.

The weeks and months leading up to that day was like a runaway train, pushing and fuming to its inevitable end. It’s true we had good moments, and I cherish those so much. I wonder where it all went wrong, but nothing truly went wrong. No one is really to blame. People grow. Sometimes they grow together, sometimes they outgrow each other or overgrow one each other, and sometimes they grow apart.

But I still hurt. I still think that if we had been together, we could have grown together, but being apart made everything harder. I still think that you cared for me, but I was in a bad place at that time, as I am every year around this time. And you didn’t have the skills or the time to care for me the way I needed to be cared for. I think I still resent you for that, but you aren’t to blame. I should let these feelings go.

A year has changed so much, and I truly think I’m in a better place. I want to say that I’ve moved on and in many ways I have. Many things have changed about me. But many things I wish would have changed haven’t changed. I still care for you, I still wonder what you’re doing and if you’re thinking of me. If the last year meant anything to you; if it meant as much to you as it did to me.

And I still hurt. These thoughts I’m thinking, they need to stop. Enough now; enough you. You drained so much energy from me. You tore me down, piece by piece. I could have done so many more things, been so many more things. But you’re not to blame. I let you do this to me, I let this happen to me. But no more, enough now I say.

I want to be better. Damn it, I will be.

I will let today hurt. I’ll let the emotions succumb, but just for one day. And then I will put it all away, and I will be better, and I will become a greater person than I was with you. You will be too. Because you are not the person that hurt me last year, you are the person you are today, and I will not resent the person you are today.

I won’t hurt anymore.

----------------------------------

Earlier this evening, my friend confided in me that her grandfather passed away. I'm praying for her, her family, her grandfather. I'm also praying that she keeps her strength, her innocence, her love for the world. Days like today can change a person, and I hope for goodness sake that this day showers her with love as she deals with all the emotions that comes with such a sorrowful passing. Please keep her in your thoughts, along with all the people you have loved and lost <3

Life lately

...And then a month goes by and I haven't posted anything. Ugh.

What have I been doing exactly? Well that's a very good question. Two words: medical school. It's basically consumed my life, or most of it (two weeks ago I took a weekend trip to Ireland, see some photos on my Instagram!) I was reminded by two of my classmates to post more outfit posts, so ask and you shall receive... soon :)

Being in medical school has changed my life. Big shocker, I know. But it's so true! In the past few years, I had become very frustrated with what my life was turning into, and not knowing where it was going put a lot of undue stress on me, mentally and emotionally. My family would keep asking me if I had gotten into medical school yet, and my little cousin was starting to apply to schools himself, so I knew I had to do something. So far, best decision I've ever made.

There haven't been too many times that I can say that phrase and not look back on it with regret. Joining the rescue squad was also one of those decisions. After a year of being pre-med and feeling like I had learned nothing about medicine during that time, I impulsively decided to fill out an application form for one of the local stations in my neighborhood. That may have been my first "best decision ever." I have learned so much about the medical system, the emergency system, and about society in general that I don't know why anyone doesn't decide to volunteer at their local fire department (or volunteer in general!). But, that's another story.... The reason why it's been one of the best thing I've ever done is that it's helped me grow into the individual that I am today, and has given me the experience to succeed in medical school. So far, I've aced my first semester, and I'm currently keeping up with the material of second semester because of the prior knowledge I've gained as a EMT/paramedic. I have no idea how my other classmates are doing this right now and I admire them greatly for it!

Medical school is tough. There is so much information being thrown at you each day and you have to be able to interpret the information and keep it somewhere in your mind palace for the rest of your life. One of my professors in grad school used to say: "Medical school is like throwing mud at the wall. You gotta keep throwing that mud until it sticks. Just keep throwing that mud!" Basically, mud referred to the amount of knowledge we were being given during class, and the wall was our brain. The biggest issue is finding the time to do all of this mud throwing! My study partner made notecards last term for histology and would fall asleep at night and wake up the next morning with notecards all over her bed (I fell asleep watching an episode on netflix to clear my head, by the way!). One of the things that keeps me going though, is the future.

Following Fran and Laura (among the many other medical bloggers out there!) shows me what I get to look forward to. That constant reminder that in a little under two years, I'm going to be out on the wards and seeing patients, working and learning alongside other health care providers... those that have come before me... pushes me to sit at the library for 12+ hours and work my butt off!

Don't worry though, I'm making sure to enjoy life as well. Like I said, I traveled to Ireland two weeks ago, and I've taken up rockclimbing again this semester! It is addicting! But no worries, I'll be back to writing on here real soon.

What have you been up to this past month?